Of the Yo Man who got his Quick Fix


(This article on Vijay Thapa was submitted by a colleague and has been published on condition of anonymity)

With porcupine hair and a ‘yo man’ attitude that could give Fido Dido a run for his money, this senor’s repertoire of stories never seems to end.

Even boring shifts can perk up in the company of our man from Meerut.

Perpetually “harrassed, harangued and hassled,” each day is a racy thriller, a whodunit or a ‘laugh until you cry’ for this bachelor with the curiously ‘propah’ British accent.

And his love affair with the office telephone… Be it conducting deals for raising money to buy a house, vigorously hunting for a buyer for his rifle, carrying out mega arguments with his mother – everything under the sun is done with a little help from Alexander Graham Bell.

The debonair dude recently had a close encounter with – Glue!

On Holi, our man was in the midst of spring cleaning when he discovered that his index finger refused to part company with his middle finger.

Contrary to his belief, Vijay Thapa found that Feviquick or Superstick or some other adhesive he was working with was indeed capable of sticking his digits together.

When the Doubting Thomas in him was convinced of his stuck state, he endeavoured to undo the damage.

First he tried kerosene. He dips his hand in the fuel but to no avail. The metacarpals of his hand refuse to give up. He pours ether, the liguid used to clean tape-recorder heads, and tries to bring his hand near a flame. Nothing!

It’s only after his panic level reached a new high, that Thapa hit upon the solution – Brasso, which finally does the trick and disentangles his fingers.

And what about the time he turned up two hours late for office. Thapa says he forgot to refill his bike’s fuel tank and was stranded midway on the flyover leading to Noida. Our hero was resigned to pushing his machine over a long long way when suddenly a scooterist offers him a can of petrol.

Whoa! A true good samaritan there. Music for the senor’s ears who couldn’t believe his luck. Man and machine soon found themselves zooming off to office where Thapa waxed eloqent on the inherent goodness of human beings.

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