Here’s a little something that I wrote some years ago –
“Hey, lady! I don’t even want to touch you. I didn’t do it deliberately. You must realise that the bus is so crowded that I am bound to touch you if the driver applies the brakes.
This is a democracy. This is a public vehicle and I certainly will ride in it. If you don’t want anybody to touch you, then please Miss hoity-toity, you could condescend to travel in your own Mercedes.
No, I am not being rude. You are being rude. Accusing me of being an eve-teaser and the like. As if falling on ugly fat girls inside a crowded bus is a preferred vocation.
Yes, you are ugly and fat. I am stating the obvious. If you call me a shameless vagabond, I have all the right to call you whatever I want to call you.
Yes, Scream and cry all you want. You have got the public on your side. Would be saviors of a defenseless Draupadi. These puny teenagers will not intimidate me. You don’t know that I was Punjab Wrestling Champion three years in a row. They better not try messing with me – I am the real Hrithik Roshan of India.
All right! I will get off the bus. Listen lady, you haven’t seen the last of me yet. Because of a few stupid females like you, being a man in this country is becoming a curse.
Ladies this! Ladies that! Adam is always wrong. Eve is divine. Ha! Injustice prevails and nobody says anything. Is there no one here to speak a word in my favor? I see – India will always remain the same. Never mind. I’ll get even with you soon. Just you wait.“